Shadow self. Dormant personality. Uncertainty. There is an endless barrage of naming conventions society uses in an attempt to quantify insecurities. Not only are they parts of ourselves that inherently connote shame, but it can sometimes feel incredibly overwhelming to overcome.
Crack your heart wide open
let the light in.
Let the love pass through
Don’t let the bullshit fill you with hate.
Let the love pass through
Rebuild your life
and start again.
It’s time to reclaim your power.
As children we are taught to be anything, to do anything. “You can achieve it all,” my mother used to tell me, but society tells a different narrative. Plastered on the front cover of each and every magazine are near-perfect specimens of the human race. “5 Tips for better abs,” “This Seasons Best and Worst Dressed,” “Top 25 Most Beautiful Women!” We, specifically women, are constantly inundated with reminders that we are not enough. Under the subterfuge of the “American Dream” and “reaching our potential” we are quietly reminded that we must always look and behave a certain way. That in order to be accepted as women, we must check this box, fit this image, shop at this store. While this poses a problem to every woman, we are also unconsciously forcing young girls to grow up with this type of harmful cultural programming.
How do you cope when the betrayal wasn’t intentional? When you never meant to harm anybody? When you are the one who betrayed the person closest to you, your best friend, your sister? We all make mistakes, sure, but are there some that can’t be overlooked or forgiven?
Moving is weird. And hard. That’s the thing that nobody tells you: after the dust has settled and your Netflix has been setup; life in a new place is strange. There will be periods of great joy and overwhelming uncertainty. Even knowing you made the right decision, the best decision, you will still ache for what is comfortable. The past. That is always safe because we have been there, we know how it plays out. It is the future we have to guess at. Will I find a great job, will I make new friends, where is the closest Starbucks? These are all questions I found myself asking the first few weeks in our new apartment. Five months in and I am happy to report that there are seven within a 5 mile radius.
Forgiveness is a powerful tool. Not only for the one who forgives, but for the people whom we share the forgiveness. At the end of every minute we are all coexisting on this planet; we make mistakes and sometimes hurt others. When we forgive we heal and so do they, in some small way. Everything on the other side of forgiveness is love. Everything on the other side of forgiveness is peace.
I love feeling exuberant, passionate, creative, loved, free.
Over the last few days I have really come to understand the power of how we feel. I have known for a while that thoughts and words contain unlimited power, but could only slightly grasp how powerful it was to feel things. Our mood sets the tone for how we behave, how we speak and what we think. That is not to say though, that we shouldn’t be constantly monitoring our thoughts and words to ensure they align with who we say we want to be.
We are taught our entire lives to be fearful, to be wary, to be cautious. What we know little and less of is to be bold, to be courageous, to be fearless.
I had not realized before this night how deeply rooted fear is within me. Yes, at times it may serve its purpose, but for the most part, all it does is to hold us back. Think for a second, what areas of your life are you not doing more because of fear.