Vulnerability is hard. It sucks. Having to share parts of myself that I have so carefully locked away into the deepest recesses of my heart. You see, I did this because I thought that by locking it away, nobody would ever know, no person would ever see it. Until…they do. That one person – the person I want to think that I am perfect, without fault. That will love me unconditionally. The key, though, is that to be loved unconditionally I have to show parts of myself that I deem “unlovable.” I have to be vulnerable – fuck.
As children we are taught to be anything, to do anything. “You can achieve it all,” my mother used to tell me, but society tells a different narrative. Plastered on the front cover of each and every magazine are near-perfect specimens of the human race. “5 Tips for better abs,” “This Seasons Best and Worst Dressed,” “Top 25 Most Beautiful Women!” We, specifically women, are constantly inundated with reminders that we are not enough. Under the subterfuge of the “American Dream” and “reaching our potential” we are quietly reminded that we must always look and behave a certain way. That in order to be accepted as women, we must check this box, fit this image, shop at this store. While this poses a problem to every woman, we are also unconsciously forcing young girls to grow up with this type of harmful cultural programming.
How do you cope when the betrayal wasn’t intentional? When you never meant to harm anybody? When you are the one who betrayed the person closest to you, your best friend, your sister? We all make mistakes, sure, but are there some that can’t be overlooked or forgiven?
Forgiveness is a powerful tool. Not only for the one who forgives, but for the people whom we share the forgiveness. At the end of every minute we are all coexisting on this planet; we make mistakes and sometimes hurt others. When we forgive we heal and so do they, in some small way. Everything on the other side of forgiveness is love. Everything on the other side of forgiveness is peace.